I’m watching SmackDown when I learn The Miz lost to Sheamus on Main Event after I started feeling good about his winning on Monday. This that ole bullshit. Also on Monday, Paul Heyman is apparently no longer going to be working with Cesaro. You can TOTALLY see how much they want him to matter, after he’s lost twice in a row to Kofi Kingston… and he didn’t really go anywhere or do anything in a VERY short run as a ‘Heyman Guy’. I just read on WrassleZone that Alicia Fox’s new gimmick that got people talking about her… dropped. WHY DOES WWE JUST KEEP INEXPLICABLY DROPPING THINGS!?!
I’ve been arguing with my LEWD brethren, unsuccessfully I might add… that Cesaro is being Dolph Ziggler’d. Then, while saying Cesaro is the future, they’re saying Dolph Ziggler has done nothing to deserve a top spot except wrestle really well. Um… you niggas know that describes Cesaro, right? In WWE Cesaro has not had ONE defining gimmick or cut a memorable promo. All he has done is wrestle well. And every few months or so, they take whatever he WAS doing, from him.
* Debuts as a pimp playa woman slayer who took Teddy Long’s girl. Wins US title. Drops both. Becomes a yodeling jabroni.
* Joins The Real Americans. Inexplicably the WWE Universe starts chanting ‘We The People’ and popping for Cesaro and his swing. Mostly does jobs, though.
* Wins The Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal. Sides with Paul Heyman, who mostly talks about Brock Lesnar, leaves because Lesnar is coming back to win the title. Loses twice in a row to Kofi Kingston.
Because I’m petty… let’s review Dolph Ziggler’s career as Dolph Ziggler.
* Debuts as a douche who constantly introduced himself to people. That was the most memorable thing about him.
* Starts being managed by Vickie Guerrero. Wins the WHC for 11 minutes before losing it back to Edge. Begins a long stretch of being a jabroni.
* Feuds with Jack Swagger over being a client of Vickie Guerrero, which is resolved by them forming a jobber tag team. SEE A PARALLEL HERE!?!
* Stops being managed by Vickie. Does nothing interesting until he feuded with John Cena over AJ and the MITB. Leaves with both.
* Cashes in MITB then they take AJ from him. Jack Swagger concusses him then he loses the WHC and hasn’t been anything to write home about SINCE.
Yeah. WWE really takes care of its midcard/upper midcard.
I’m watching Chris Jericho versus Luke Harper, which reminds me Y2J came back and did a finisher on The Miz and walked right into a high level midcard feud with Bray Wyatt. Are we gonna call Miz’s interactions with Sheamus a high level midcard feud? You could… Sheamus is US champion. Former WWE champ and WHC. If I had the book… I would have Miz beat Sheamus in the IC title battle royal then unite the titles at SummerSlam. This seems like something they might do. Irony of ironies… the way Miz has always been booked reminds me of Jericho back when he unified the WWE title and WHC.
Jericho was an annoying heel who no one expected to beat The Rock and Stone Cold Steve Austin in one night. In a parallel, no one expected Miz to beat Cena in a Mania main event, but he did because of The Rock. Listen. I get that heels cheat to win and take advantage of circumstances to get the upper hand. However… there is a difference between booking a heel as a dirty cheater and booking them as a pussy who only wins because he had help. Look at Randy Orton’s last title reign. The heat would have been on him if he low blows Bryan, pokes him in the eye, clocks him with the belt, etc. But all the heat was on The Authority, and Orton was nothing more than a puppet. Jericho only won the undisputed title because Booker T had issues with The Rock and Vince hated Stone Cold. Then Miz only beat Cena because The Rock had beef with him.
I would never ever ever under any circumstances say Y2J or Miz should ever be booked like a top superstar. Like a Cena or Hogan etc. What I am saying, is with certain guys you have little reason to believe in them as champion, and then they win the damn belt and never really look like a champion. Kind of like Daniel Bryan’s WHC reign. He spent that entire reign running from Big Show and Mark Henry. I don’t really know how he got over. He was jobbing like a motherfucker before he cashed in the MITB, then he never beat those grown men clean. Then he had to survive Santino in the Elimination Chamber. Then he dropped the title in 18 seconds. Fast forward to last year and he beat Cena the fuck up and pinned him clean. Stop right there and it’s night and day! He beat Orton… they booked him like Orton could do nothing about him. He beat HHH and Kane. Daniel Bryan is not 5’10 230, fam. He is booked like he is legit. And people still complained he was being buried when Orton was gifted the title all them times. LOL.
If somehow you lack reading comprehension skills, indubitably you aren’t reading this. If you is… then my point can be summed up with: I want to see guys get storylines and characters that make sense consistently. And when guys show potential to be upper midcard to main event, they should not lose to Kofi Kingston, trade wins all the time or only win by screwy finish.